I've been in Nicaragau for the past 3 weeks on a mission trip, and I have found myself in a very uncomfortable position. There's a woman who came on the trip with the wrong motive...she came because she really likes me, and it's sooooo obvious. I don't like her at all and I feel very awkward when I'm around her. In fact the whole team has been irritated by her presence. We're a bunch of Christian surfers serving at an orphanage and doing a little surfing too. I feel bad for her, and I don't quite know what to say to her. Any advice.

I've been in Nicaragau for the past 3 weeks on a mission trip, and I have found myself in a very uncomfortable position. There's a woman who came on the trip with the wrong motive...she came because she really likes me, and it's sooooo obvious. I don't like her at all and I feel very awkward when I'm around her. In fact the whole team has been irritated by her presence. We're a bunch of Christian surfers serving at an orphanage and doing a little surfing too. I feel bad for her, and I don't quite know what to say to her. Any advice.

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Is there a leader of your group? someone you can go to and discuss your thoughts about this? You say that others are irritated as well by her behavior and actions...maybe one of the other ladies can talk to her in private about what her priorities should be and the type of behavior that is acceptable?
You could just go to her and be honest with her and tell her that you are there for a specific reason, and give her your reason.
I wouldn't feel bad for her, she's actually the one who is out of line here.


Praying that the Lord gives you the words to say. :)

God bless you and your work there!

Is there a leader of your group? someone you can go to and discuss your thoughts about this? You say that others are irritated as well by her behavior and actions...maybe one of the other ladies can talk to her in private about what her priorities should be and the type of behavior that is acceptable?
You could just go to her and be honest with her and tell her that you are there for a specific reason, and give her your reason.
I wouldn't feel bad for her, she's actually the one who is out of line here.


Praying that the Lord gives you the words to say. :)

God bless you and your work there!

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Amen kelly...
i would have said the same advices that kelly gave.. praise the lord...

indeed better you tell her before its too late, because those who are irrated might feel very really uncomfortable and might say something to her...
act with god's intelligence and words!

God bless you and every one there helping the orphans. really great job! May god bless every one of you!

Amen kelly...
i would have said the same advices that kelly gave.. praise the lord...

indeed better you tell her before its too late, because those who are irrated might feel very really uncomfortable and might say something to her...
act with god's intelligence and words!

God bless you and every one there helping the orphans. really great job! May god bless every one of you!

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I wouldn't talk to her myself, if I were you. Well maybe as a last chance... but 1st I would try to talk to a leader. As you said, other ppl are irritated about her presence, so might be that others wanna talk to her too and you don't know :)

A woman would be definitely the best choice in this case, a mature and wise woman of God.

I said you shouldn't go because you said you feel awkward when you are around her. And this feeling might be easy to notice, and the talk might.... go wrong :D

This is what I think. May God give you wisdom.

I wouldn't talk to her myself, if I were you. Well maybe as a last chance... but 1st I would try to talk to a leader. As you said, other ppl are irritated about her presence, so might be that others wanna talk to her too and you don't know :)

A woman would be definitely the best choice in this case, a mature and wise woman of God.

I said you shouldn't go because you said you feel awkward when you are around her. And this feeling might be easy to notice, and the talk might.... go wrong :D

This is what I think. May God give you wisdom.

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my advice is : ask her to go for a walk with u cos u need to have a little chat to her...explain to her what u have told us and tell her that if her motives for her comming to this mission are becasue of u then she shouldnt have done that ..explain to her that you are not interested in her romanticly but u love her as a sister and thats as far as u will go..be honest and open with her... dont gosip or speak bad about her to other colegues its not nice..be straight up with her...might be u have been nice to her and she took that as u liking her too..so the best is be honest and sincere with her ..she will appreciate it in the end..

my advice is : ask her to go for a walk with u cos u need to have a little chat to her...explain to her what u have told us and tell her that if her motives for her comming to this mission are becasue of u then she shouldnt have done that ..explain to her that you are not interested in her romanticly but u love her as a sister and thats as far as u will go..be honest and open with her... dont gosip or speak bad about her to other colegues its not nice..be straight up with her...might be u have been nice to her and she took that as u liking her too..so the best is be honest and sincere with her ..she will appreciate it in the end..

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Good comments....Josh also remember she have feelings as well ok so try to be gentle but honest whereas rejection tends to hurt you can help to elevate some of the discomfort she will feel when you confront her.

Also if you decide on speaking with your leader beseech him not to alienate her from the group but instead be a living witness to her daily.....Let her know of you standard in the Lord and that you wish not to compromise those standards.....let her know that you only want to be friends nothing more.

Good comments....Josh also remember she have feelings as well ok so try to be gentle but honest whereas rejection tends to hurt you can help to elevate some of the discomfort she will feel when you confront her.

Also if you decide on speaking with your leader beseech him not to alienate her from the group but instead be a living witness to her daily.....Let her know of you standard in the Lord and that you wish not to compromise those standards.....let her know that you only want to be friends nothing more.

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foxy, is not gossip. Is asking for advice from someone, as you don't say it with bad thougths, to hurt her or to make her look bad.... I still say is not ok to tlak to her, only the of you, based on what you said, Josh. And a walk alone?? Why not in the dim light of the night, where only the Moon sees you? heheheh.. KIDDING. But my point still remains the same :->

foxy, is not gossip. Is asking for advice from someone, as you don't say it with bad thougths, to hurt her or to make her look bad.... I still say is not ok to tlak to her, only the of you, based on what you said, Josh. And a walk alone?? Why not in the dim light of the night, where only the Moon sees you? heheheh.. KIDDING. But my point still remains the same :->

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well antaraxia if he was afraid of that woman ok i agree to involve a third party but... he is a man enough to be straight up with her and honest just remember this, we dont know the other side of this situation we only hear one side ..so there is always 2 sides of a story lets not asume she is in the wrong here cos she might have not be ...men can lead women on easily cos we can be vonerable etc especially when it comes to liking someone and that someone is nice to us..thats why its important that he makes it clear to her and not the 3rd party to get involved ..what kind of a man that makes him if he is going to hide behind someone else? only a coward would do something like that...........so BE A MAN AND FACE YOUR SITUATION !!! :)

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foxy, is not gossip. Is asking for advice from someone, as you don't say it with bad thougths, to hurt her or to make her look bad.... I still say is not ok to tlak to her, only the of you, based on what you said, Josh. And a walk alone?? Why not in the dim light of the night, where only the Moon sees you? heheheh.. KIDDING. But my point still remains the same :->

well antaraxia if he was afraid of that woman ok i agree to involve a third party but... he is a man enough to be straight up with her and honest just remember this, we dont know the other side of this situation we only hear one side ..so there is always 2 sides of a story lets not asume she is in the wrong here cos she might have not be ...men can lead women on easily cos we can be vonerable etc especially when it comes to liking someone and that someone is nice to us..thats why its important that he makes it clear to her and not the 3rd party to get involved ..what kind of a man that makes him if he is going to hide behind someone else? only a coward would do something like that...........so BE A MAN AND FACE YOUR SITUATION !!! :)

=== Original Message ===
foxy, is not gossip. Is asking for advice from someone, as you don't say it with bad thougths, to hurt her or to make her look bad.... I still say is not ok to tlak to her, only the of you, based on what you said, Josh. And a walk alone?? Why not in the dim light of the night, where only the Moon sees you? heheheh.. KIDDING. But my point still remains the same :->

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but do it wisely :)

but do it wisely :)

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Has she told you DIRECTLY that she likes you? The devil can make you believe things about people that are not true. Maybe she is one of those women who are naturally flirtatious. They flirt but they don't know that they are doing it.

If she is making INDIRECT advances then you cannot really confront that. the best thing to do do is write down the incidents where she makes advances to you and then talk to your superiors and build a harassment case against her

Has she told you DIRECTLY that she likes you? The devil can make you believe things about people that are not true. Maybe she is one of those women who are naturally flirtatious. They flirt but they don't know that they are doing it.

If she is making INDIRECT advances then you cannot really confront that. the best thing to do do is write down the incidents where she makes advances to you and then talk to your superiors and build a harassment case against her

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